Mama hands freezing Crown Royal to Liam: Take this to Dada, please.
Liam, 6: Here, Dada, Dada, Dada. Here. What is it? Ink?
Before unit 4 math test, Mama coaches: If I gave you 5 M&M's, you can't TAKE 15 from them. But if I gave you 15, you COULD make 5 sets of 3.
Carrie: No. I'd just eat them.
Liam: Can we move around in Heaven? I hope there's clouds cuz if you trip and fall you don't wanna scrape your face. If you trip and fall on clouds you won't get hurt.
While listening to Les Mis, Mama comments: Poor Eponine.
Liam: Why poor Eponine?
Mama explains: The man she loves loves another girl more than her.
Liam: Oh! Probably feels like friendly fire!
Talking about winning SkyMiles, Mama asks: Who says we can't take the kids with us?
Dada raises his hand.
Carrie: Yeah, we HAVE been obnoxious lately...
Liam: Are we going home to get beatings? Oh boy! Haha. I'm just kidding.
"Went out for a run. 7:10 AM. Love ya, Scott. PS Duck Donuts here I come!" ~note from OBX
Carrie: We're setting a record of how long we can stay upstairs, so Mama, can you bring us room service?
Mama: Um, no. Come down here and eat.
Mama to a post-puking Carrie: You look like your normal self.
Carrie: Yeah. But I bet not on the inside.
Liam, 6: I love every speck of nature that God made us. Even though it makes me sneeze.
Mama to Liam, 6: Do you know that you're incredibly gorgeous?
Liam: *sigh* Of course I know. Geez.
Liam, 6, hands Mama a snack-size bag of Skittles: Can you please open these so that they don't *BOOM* all over creation?
Playing Scrabble at age 8, Carrie: I have "loy."
Mama: That's not a word.
Carrie. Oh. Yes, it is. Like "lawyer!"
Liam's in the bathroom a LONG time. Mama: You okay, Liam?
Liam: Yep. *Pause* Didn't fall in or anything.
Mama: Good.
Liam: Cuz I was STANDING! *diabolical laugh*
Mama: Can you pass me my phone, please?
Liam, at the table: Do you mind if it's sticky?
Carrie: Read me another Bible story.
Mama: Hmm. "Respect your mother and father." Hmm. How about that!?
Carrie: Not THAT one.
Mama: ARGH! How can you STILL be hungry?
Liam: I guess I'm just a hog.
Mama and Liam, 5.5, are talking about butts (again) and Mama says: Another word for butt is "buttocks."
Liam: "Butt ducks!?"
Liam, 5.5, with a twinkle in his eye: Mama, I love you.
Mama: I love you, too.
Liam: I'm hungry. Can I have a snack?
Mama: Hmm, there's something I was going to tell you. What was it?
Liam, 5 and three-fourths: I dunno. I can't read your brain.
Mama: I got you Star Wars valentines for your party.
Liam: YAY! Are there light sabers at the end for extramation marks?
Dada: I don't know what that was, but you need to focus on your food.
Liam: It was inner peace!
Dada: Fine, but if you do anything other than eat your dinner, it won't be inner peace, it will be outer pain!
Damon: MAMA! (22 months, FINALLY. Until now it had always been "Dada", which was used to mean "person I love")
Liam trying to explain fractions to Mama: You just don't get math, Mama.
Mama, asking Carrie about her spelling test: Didja get "evaluate"?
Carrie: I'm sure I did.
Mama: How about "solve"? Didja do S-O-V-L-E?
Carrie, enthusiastic: Yep! I DID!
Mama: Cuz that's WRONG.
Carrie: Oh. No! I did it right! Hehehehee!
Liam, examining his tissue: Woah. That was boogerful.
Liam, 5 and 35/36ths, drawing: I'm gonna make an alien..................cow.
Mama to Dada: Whaddaya think your favorite part of the race will be?
Liam, from the backseat: Hopefully winning winning winning!
Liam, almost 6, wiggling eyebrows: "BUS." There's a silent f.
Liam: Did you put ketchup on it?
Mama: Yes. And spaghetti sauce. It's plain.
Liam: And sauce. OTherwise it wouldn't be sloppy joe. It'd just be Joe.
Mama: ENOUGH! I should not have to listen to toys peeing! I should not have to say things like that.....
Liam: The greatest mom in the whole entire planet is you.
Mama: Aww, thanks.
Liam: I'm hungry. Can I have a snack?
Damon, 18 months, singsong: Gall gone. (All gone.)
Liam to Dada, post-run: You really ARE sweaty. I can see your shines.
Checking Carrie's teeth (at age 8!) before bed, Mama notices: That's CORN! Disgusting!
Carrie: I didn't have corn tonight. I had it LAST night.
Mama: !!!
Carrie, in the car, waiting to "be bad": If I promise to keep my big fat mouth shut and not tell Liam?
Carrie, singing: tom ti doo... I'm drivelling a soccer ball *pause* balloon *pause* basket ball!
Liam, to Rusted Root, singing: Send me on my way, drum drum drum, send me on my way...
Liam: Amphibian and beyond
Mama: !
Carrie, 8.5: Thanks for taking my butt seriously. (Thanks for making my seat warm.)
Mama to Dada in Pepe: You made a good choice. You had a good idea.
Dada: Yay. Once in my life.
Mama: You've had lots of good ideas. I can think of 3 right now.
Dada: Hawaii trip?
Mama: I was thinking of Things One, Two and Three, but yes.
Dada: Those were impulse.
Liam,6: That upset butt was actually a bum burp.
Mama: English is so hard. You guys are learning a hard language.
Carrie: Spanish is -
Mama: Spanish is easier. If you can say it, you can spell it. Not many silent letters.
Dada perks up: Oui! Wait...
Dada snags ANOTHER fresh-from-the-oven chocolate chip cookie.
Mama: STOP IT! That's FOUR!
Dada: Do not keep a record of wrongs! *Hightails it out of the kitchen at Mama's glare, laughing hysterically*
"Hard work spotlights the character of people: Some turn up their sleeves, some turn up their noses, and some don't turn up at all." ~Sam Ewing, writer and radio announcer
Carrie, on a cold, rainy afternoon after school: Thank you, God, that I was born when hot chocolate was invented!
Liam, 5 and 11/12ths: Can I have some of those?
Mama: Marshmallows? Yep. Hinrew used to call them "marshmalloons."
Liam: Can I have some mushballoons? I mean... hahaha!
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